shopping

So I decided to go shopping, which I haven't done in a long time. I'm not much of a shopper; I have to be in the mood to do it. Well, I felt "in the mood" and I wanted to look half-way decent at an upcoming wedding this weekend. I trekked to St. Jo to the mall (I know! wow!) and began my search. I have a few shopping downfalls. #1 - I really don't like to spend money on clothes so in order to buy something, I have to really really love it, or someone has to persuade me that I really really love it. #2 - I'm indecisive about clothes, so I always say that I'll look somewhere else and come back, and then by the time I've looked "somewhere else," I've completely talked myself out of buying whatever it was that I liked.

So, bearing my faults in mind, I entered the mall. I entered through the Sears hardware department and got lost trying to find my way into the mall. I briefly stopped in the "too small- too tight" section, commonly known as the juniors to see if there was anything appealing. #2 kicked in and I told myself I'd come back. I then proceeded out into the mall, feeling confident that I could accomplish my mission. I walked into a store that had some pretty nice stuff, and promptly walked out when I saw the prices. You call that on sale?!? Too bad, because their stuff really WAS nice, but I can't talk myself into buying a shirt that costs over $20.00. Do you know how much rice/pasta that would buy?!

Undaunted, I walked into another store and found some stuff that looked awesome on the perfect little model things, but not so much on me. Plus, I ran into the size phenomenon.
In stores such as this one, I find that all concepts of size have been altered. Think you're a medium? Think again! You have entered the realm of "extra-small" and "size 0." A large or X-large usually fits as a medium on me. I wanted to try some stuff on, but the dressing rooms were locked and I had to wait for one of the clerks. I stood around and waited, listening to two girls, one of which was named "Bianca" (made me happy for some reason) talk about prom dresses and how one of them (not Bianca) was unable to "fill out the dress" as well as the other. Nice. I finally was granted access to a dressing room and tried on some stuff. Didn't quite work for me, so I left Bianca and friend in search of another store.

I tried a few more stores, to no avail. I left one store when I couldn't figure out whether the thing I was touching was a skirt or a shirt. This perplexed me for quite some time, and I stood there looking at it for awhile before I realized I was way out of my league. I found other stores where there were shirts that looked terribly complicated to put on, and I had to throw myself into a clothing rack circle thing to avoid being run over by a group of teenage girls, all wearing pretty much the same thing, only in different colors. I then tried another store that didn't look so "too small-too tight." I walked in and slowed down to listen to the music playing. It was familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. Then I realized that it was "You light up my life" (to which I found myself singing along to) and some old lady was whistling (badly) the tune. It wasn't the singing version, but like "Dino does the 60's" instrumental version. Wow. I smiled, and walked out. After having exhausted all possible stores, I finally gave up. I found NOTHING. But my quest continues, and for those of you who will be in attendance at the wedding, if you see me wearing something new...I have won.